For many reasons, I have been thinking a lot about mortality lately. And, as if the universe was trying to send me a message, I saw this post on Instagram yesterday from one of my favorite writers that I really needed to see.
I have been worrying, stressing, crying about money for the past year. It has literally consumed my thoughts. How will we ever afford the Charleston housing market? How will we pay 80K/year in college tuition on top of another kiddo’s tuition? And I am realizing that was simply a waste of time. I convinced my husband we needed to take out loans for the bigger tuition, and he is finally on board. And guess what? Those loans will get paid off regardless of whether or not I do budget math on the daily. If today was my last day on earth, do I want to be remembered as the mom/partner/friend who was always stressed about money? Spoiler: the answer is no. I did do some exploring with my therapist about why money is so triggering for me and think it goes back to it being a source of power and control in my parent’s relationship and feeling guilty for not generating any income for the first time since I was 14 years old with our recent move.
So I am letting go of my money worries and challenging myself to do one good thing every single day. Here are a few from this week that I am proud of.
- With my new big dog rescue, I am heading up the Pets with Families Initiative to finding funds for families who need to surrender their pup for financial reasons. My first project is Griswold, a Newfipoo with really bad allergies. My hope is that a donation of $100-$200/mo could get him allergy shots and supplements that will allow him to stay with his family who loves him dearly.
- With the new non profit I am working with, we have an official logo, 501c3 application complete, and I found a local business interested in doing a fundraiser for our summer pilot programming.
- I spent last Friday night with my bestie from high school and my daughter at the Indigo Girls concert at Davidson college. The last time my friend and I saw them in concert was 1991. We both made long drives to make it happen, and my heart was so full of love after our time together.
One good thing. Every single day. No one is guaranteed tomorrow, so make today the best it can be.