I am officially in uncharted territory as a parent. I am the parent of two adult children. It really hit me when I was notified on my youngest’s 18th birthday that I will no longer receive reminders or notifications about her prescriptions. That might seem like an odd trigger, but it felt like one more thing that I used to be responsible for and now I am totally out of the loop. Another weird trigger – when my oldest went away to college last fall, and he had to give me PERMISSION to access his school account to make tuition payments. And don’t even get me started on the HIPPA laws that restrict parent access to children’s medical records. I remember it being once they turned 14 for mine in NC. Hello HIPPA, they cannot drive themselves to appointments, pay for said appointments. Sigh, I digress.

When my children were little, I was always a mom FIRST. I had a career, but they were the first and foremost focus of every single professional decision I made. I am lucky, in that, I could work but also be home for them after school. My husband did not have that flexibility with his job.

But here I am, with almost two decades of being a parent, and they do not need me anymore. I am proud of both of my kiddos. They are turning into amazing adults and will both do great things in this world, however, I am struggling with no longer being in the driver seat. I want to help them make good decisions and the best choices, but that is no longer my role. I have to hope that all that parenting foundation work “stuck” and they remember what I taught them.

What a hard place to be as a parent. No longer in the driver seat, but still having to watch as those babies of mine learn to navigate the world. I guess I need to buckle up for this new ride.

• lifeinmiddleage